Why Screening & Deposits Matter

For many years, I operated without requiring screening or deposits However, now require both-despite the fact it has lost me many potential clients-and I have no plans to discontinue these requirements at any point in the forseeable future. Experience has taught me that these measures are essential for -maintaining my own safety in this industry. So, while losing out on potential income may be the trade-off, it is one which I am more than happy to make. While some clients may view these policies as unnecessary or inconvenient, they serve an essential purpose—protection. 

The Importance of Screening

Screening potential clients allows sex workers to vet individuals and identify potential threats, such as those with a history of violence, aggression, or deceitful intentions. These measures aren’t about exclusion but about ensuring a safe and respectful interaction for all parties involved.

By undergoing screening, a client demonstrates a willingness to respect professional boundaries and acknowledges that this is a business arrangement, not a casual or personal favor. If a potential client is unwilling to meet reasonable screening requirements, it raises concerns about their ability to respect boundaries during an appointment.

Think about it this way: if someone disregards clear, upfront requirements before a session even begins, how can a provider trust that they will respect agreements, time, or personal safety once the session starts? Screening isn't about making things difficult—it’s about establishing trust & ensuring safety during a time which places the provider at a significant disadvantage in most cases due to average size differentation between males and females, ability to report to law enforcement and be believed, and-as can be seen historically-the distressing but statistically proven fact that sex work is one of the most dangerous professions there is & the likelihood of a provider being attacked & killed by a client is far higher than the other way around .

Why Require a Deposit?

Deposits serve multiple purposes, all of which contribute to a more professional and safe experience for both the provider and the client. 

For example, deposit serves to:

• Filters Out Unreliable Clients – A deposit deters those who may not be serious about booking, preventing time-wasters and last-minute cancellations.
• Compensates for Time & Expenses – If a client cancels or no-shows, the provider loses valuable time and potential income. Deposits help ensure at least partial compensation for time and effort.
• Establishes a Business Framework – Just like any professional service, deposits reinforce the understanding that this is a business transaction, deserving of respect and commitment.

A deposit is not a punishment—it’s a standard business practice across countless industries. You wouldn’t book a hotel room or a plane ticket without securing it financially, so why should a provider’s time be treated any differently?

Respecting Boundaries & Professionalism

As a client, you have every right to decide where to invest your money. However, what you don’t have the right to do is dictate the policies, procedures, or terms of service that a provider has set for their business.

To put it into perspective, you wouldn’t walk into an electronics store and say, “I like this microwave, but I don’t agree with your warranty policy, so I’ll just make up my own.” Yet, providers constantly receive messages like, “I’ll just pay in cash when I get there, okay?”—as if their clearly stated policies are negotiable or unimportant.

If a potential client is unwilling or unable to fulfill the requirements to meet, which have been clearly stated up front, ahead of time, yet still attempts to book, they are likely not a good candidate for a session. If they cannot respect even these simple boundaries, it is a logical next step to assume they may be pushy, or disrespect and/or disregard boundaries during an appointment as well. If they decide to disregard these requirements, when there are many other providers they could contact who do not have them, then they are already not treating this as a business arrangement, or respecting those professional boundaries. As the “buyer” of services/goods, one can select to invest ones money, or not, in whatever they so choose. However, what the “buyer” does not get to do is determine the price, policies, warranty, procedures, etc…of the product or service.

This kind of disregard undermines the professionalism of the provider and, frankly, is disrespectful. If you wouldn’t challenge policies at a retail store, why would you do so with an independent service provider?

Balancing Safety & Privacy

While screening and deposits protect providers, clients also have a right to feel safe. In today’s digital world, information is more accessible than ever, and you have multiple ways to verify a provider’s legitimacy before booking.

Sex workers face more security risks and encounter more clients than the client does providers, making discernment crucial. Suspicious behavior, such as vague communication or disrespectful attitudes, can indicate potential dangers. As a client, your access in this day and age to an abundance of information should be used to your advantage. Always do your due diligence and take the time to research your provider ahead of time-whether via social media, provider referral, review boards & forums, community reference sites, or whatever other means you so choose-make sure that you are never sacrificing your own safety & protection of your private & personal information. Check your providers website to see if they have a privacy policy detailing how they handle sensitive information, how long it will be stored and the like. Inquire about an NDE (non disclosure agreement) if it would make you more comfortable. There are a multitude of options and resources at your disposal-use them! And never hesitate to ask for advice from a trusted source like a reputable provider in the industry-just remember, time is money, and a tip is always greatly appreciated in situations like this-especially if you are requesting information to help you book time with another provider!

A little bit of courtesy and consideration goes a long way! Here’s how you can protect yourself while respecting a provider’s policies:

• Research the provider – Check their website, social media, or professional profiles.
• Read reviews – Use community forums, provider referral sites, or trusted review boards.
• Ask about privacy policies – Inquire about how your information is handled, stored, and protected.
• Consider an NDA – If privacy is a major concern, ask about signing a Non-Disclosure Agreement for peace of mind.
• Respect their time – If you seek detailed advice from a provider (especially about booking with someone else), a small tip as a courtesy is always appreciated.

Remember, your privacy and comfort matter—but so does the provider’s safety. If you don’t feel comfortable with a provider’s policies, don’t argue or try to negotiate. Simply move on to someone whose approach aligns better with your preferences.

A Final Thought

Screening and deposits are not about control or inconvenience; they exist to create a safer, more professional, and mutually respectful environment in an industry that has historically been one of the most dangerous professions.

While you might worry about losing a deposit, a provider may be recalling a traumatic past experience—perhaps a time before they implemented screening when they were harmed and unable to report it. The harsh reality is that many providers have been treated as the perpetrators rather than the victims when seeking help, only adding to their trauma.

t Ican be a touchy subject for many providers, and for good reason. While you may be worried about losing a $100 deposit, your provider may be recalling that last time before she began requiring screening when she was raped and unable to report any helpful information to law enforcement, who perhaps treated her as the perpetrator instead of the victim, just to exacerbate the situation, or made crude, inappropriate remarks towards her at a time when compassion and kindness was of the upmost importance.

At the end of the day, you have options—just as providers do. If a particular provider’s screening or deposit policy doesn’t work for you, that’s okay! Find someone who aligns better with your comfort level, and ensure your experience is safe, enjoyable, and professional for both parties.

Respect goes both ways!